Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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