That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
