its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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