Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize