Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
