How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
