dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
