That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
