Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize