Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
