the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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