Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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