HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
