Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Operation Purity has been aborted
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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