Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
