just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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