I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
