Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
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