My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
