I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
the condom got lost in my hair
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
