That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
