How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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