The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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