where am i from again
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
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