let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
3pm strippers are depressing
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
