Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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