yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
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