i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Even the bartender felt bad for me
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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