Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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