this just has baby written all over it
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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