yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
