every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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