Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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