if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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