so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Someone signed my nipple.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize