Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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