just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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