It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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