He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
