you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Randomize
