Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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