Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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