If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
