If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
4 words: hood of his car
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
