I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
