I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
