just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize