i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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