you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
