Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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