i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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